My wife offers her view of me to the world :)

Most of you know my husband, Jason.  Well, I’ve been trying to figure him out for more than a few years now, and I think I’ve come pretty close.

He either suffers from ADHD, or Asperger’s Syndrome.

Wait, don’t laugh.  Hear me out.

When he is focused on something, it is with laserlike intensity.  A bomb could go off 3 feet from him, and he’d never even notice.  I’ve seen Miriam put things in his ear, but if he’s trying to figure out some new code, he doesn’t notice at all.  Hours later he wonders why he has cracker bits on his collar.  His social skills are, how to put this gently, not his strongest suit.  He’d much rather sit home in front of his computer, coding, than interact with people.  For years, he got along just fine with zero involvement with the opposite sex, at least of a romantic nature.  He just wasn’t interested in, or looking for, a relationship.  Hence, the thinking he might, if a child today, be diagnosed with Asperger’s.  Also, from talking to his mother, I’ve learned that he didn’t talk until he was 3, and barely engaged in imaginative play.  He was far more interested in building and sorting things as a small child, and being alone on his computer once older.  Seems to fit, no?

But, when something doesn’t have his laser focus, he has the attention span of a squirel who has just downed a 6 pack of Mountain Dew.  He is the most easily distracted, forgetful man I’ve ever known.  He’ll be half way through a sentence, and completely forget not only what he was going to say next, but the entire topic at hand, and even that he was involved in a conversation.  Something else will have caught his eye for half a second, and his brain is gone.

I’ve talked to his coworkers, and he’s the same way at work.  Sometimes, he’ll drop words, or even sentences from a paragraph (that he is speaking!) and not even notice that 1/2 of it is missing.  You look at him, and have no choice but to say “huh?” and his response? “I forget”.

Seriously, squirel.  Hence thinking he has ADHD.

So, I’m torn.  Does he fall under the autism spectrum, or the attention deficit hyperactivity spectrum?

Perhaps it is both.

Either way, having children with this man I’ve realized one thing: I’m totally screwed.


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3 Replies to “My wife offers her view of me to the world :)”

  1. Hmmmm. So did his unique mind get him latched onto perl, or did perl change an otherwise sane man?

    Either way, I’ve never seen anybody so happy with life, with love, with you and Miriam. He loves you more than I do, and that’s saying a lot!

  2. Hey Rebecca,

    I’ve got a step-nephew with Aspergers and I think Jason is probably OK. I live my life with coders as a developer journalist and even married a Java engineer.


    If you really need to know more about love in the code zone – and I’m sure you don’t as I know you love Jason to bits like the rest of us – then try this:

    Seven reasons to love developers on Valentine’s Day,1000000567,10007311o-2000458459b,00.htm


  3. Hi Becca..
    Reading all that and sitting next to him for last almost 3 years, we are still keeping him due the laser focus part.. just focus on the good part.. forget the bad stuff.. thats what life is about .. IMHO..


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